I ran (sorta!)

Hello friends!

Today i’m grateful for MY ability to take a chance and do something that is REALLY out of my comfort zone. What was it you ask??

I completed my first day of training of the #5Kin100days ! To be quite honest with you, I wasn’t sure i’d be able to actually complete it. I am the girl who has never really run in my life. I’m the girl who has 200+ pounds to lose. And i’m the girl who wants to run. I started with my warm up – I didn’t think it was too bad….a few minutes of walking…I can handle that…right? Okay…i’ve completed that…now it’s time to get stretched out! Again – this shouldn’t be to bad right? I can handle it. Alright! Now it’s time to move on to something a bit more intense…my confidence began to fade. I sucked it up, turned my stop watch on to the correct number of minutes, blasted some Lady Gaga and was off! At the 5 minute mark, I was ready to quit. Those evil and negative thoughts that are so good at what they do started to creep up. “Why the hell are you trying this? You’ll just quit like you do every other program you start”, “Look at how riduclous you look!” and my favorite of all “Look at how fast THAT person is running! You call this running?!?!” Okay! That needed to stop or I wasn’t going to finish! Fine…what do I do? I start naming off family members who are important to me; Mom, sis, neice, dad, Housemate . Next Bloggers who inspire me, Jen @ Priorfatgirl, Tara @ Alifechangingjourney.com and Emmie @ Skinnyemmie.com. Wow! The next thing I know my stop watch is going off! I made it!! On to the next portion, I actually have to run. I set my stop watch and go…slow but steady, I go. Naming the important people in my family “Mom, sis, niece, dad, housemate” on to the bloggers “Jen! Tara! Emmie! Brad!” (The list would have gone on, but my stop watch beep! Holy shit! I just ran! (well..jogged…but who’s counting??) On to the next portion, rinse and repeat! I was on the third set of running and I have a revelation. I kept repeating other peoples names, repeating bloggers that inspire me, family members, and it dawned on me “I’m doing this for me!” My last set of running I repeated over and over again “You are worth it Sarah, you’re doing this because you deserve so much more”

Yes, of course it’s wonderful to have these people who inspire me and are in my court. It’s great to know I have people to lean on when things get rough. When it all comes down to it, i’m not going to lose 200 pounds for someone else, i’m not going to get my ass out and run IN PUBLIC for someone else, and i’m not going to keep track of my food day in and day out for someone else. I will do it because I need to.

I started my cool down, found a bench to sit on and I cried. I cried because I completed this task I thought was impossible. I cried because I was happy, I was excited, I was amazed at what my body allowed me to do.

Today was a rough day at work and for the whole 40 minutes I was focused on my workout, work didn’t cross my mind one time. That’s a true gift.

I’ve made a very satisfying dinner, packed my lunch and dinner for tomorrow at work and am going to head off to get some rest.

Until next time,

Sarah

(view from bench where I sat and cried)

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May 31, 2011. Uncategorized.

4 Comments

  1. "K Saylor" replied:

    Sarah,
    Today is also my first day in the ‘5K in 100 Days’ program. We can do this!!
    Karenne

  2. Niki replied:

    Congrats! Take that feeling of pride with you when you have another sucky day at work. I hate running while I’m doing it but feel so empowered when it’s done. I totally get why you cried.

  3. Bambi replied:

    Congrats!! I’m glad I’m not the only one who cried after they finished that first workout for the #5kin100days.

    You are on the right path with the motivation for change being for you. I spent the last 10 years losing a few pounds here and there in an attempt to please others. This time I’m doing it for me.

    We can do this!!

  4. Shenanigans replied:

    Congrats!! Today will be my first day in the program and I’m really looking forward to it. #5kin100days we can do this!!

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